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You could have been anyone

4/13/2020

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You could have been anyone.
That first kiss at the airport could have been any first kiss, made into something more than it ever was, in my hopeless heart. Everything could have proceeded as it did. We could have had a bad first date and fought like a couple ready for divorce after only a few days... it could have happened exactly like it did, and not meant anything.

You could have been anyone.

We could have had a spectacular first few days together, random Home Depot And home improvement dates... it could have ended there, where no emotions were involved. Just a spectacular stop in a long line of spectacular stops around the country and then world.

You could have been anyone.

You could have been the person I sat next to on BART or the stranger I pass on my daily walk, as the whole world tries to cope with new rules and a collective trauma. You could have been a one night stand or a left swipe, never to take up space in my mind or my heart.

You could have been anyone.

I welcomed you into the soft spot just below my heart where tree turns into a cherry blossom... That spot where there is now a massive scar- testament to the detours life puts in your way. I gave you my deep breaths and exhales on hot nights during the summer and fall; and trusted you when you said my feelings mattered in that robotic way of someone who really doesn’t give a shit.

You could have been anyone.

You reminded me of the importance of speaking my needs and transparency. You taught me how important my feelings really are, and how my intuition is on point. You were the reason I know honesty is paramount, and empathy is vital. You brought my worth to the fore... not because you treated me with that worth, but exactly because you didn’t. Because every time you text me still, you don’t.

You could have been anyone, but you weren’t.
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    Cora Leighton

    Thoughts about womyn, bodies, performance, life, play, and general randomness.
    If you think things are about you-- they probably aren't.

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