I stand at the sink, finishing up with the dishes. I turn and exhale. Butterflies stir in my soul but I don't feel nervous. I know I am waiting for you. And you are worth this second, minute, hour, week, month and year.
A firm knock at the door calms the butterflies. I open the door and feel like I am both floating and sinking into the ground, toes curling with anticipation. Before I can inhale again, I feel your lips on mine and the smile that was resting in my heart explodes out of my teeth, tongue, lips, mouth. Your smile envelopes me when we part....
"hey beautiful!" You say with eyes sparkling.
My eyes dart but you bring them back by a soft touch with your hand. It starts on my forearm but quickly finds its way to my hand as we make our way inside, to the couch.
Your locks fall over your cheeky smile as our eyes meet and we start talking about our days, in the most routine and novel way. It's like we have had this conversation hundreds of times, and even this, the 701st time feels completely new.
You lean back against my pillow- the one I bought before I knew you. The one with the trailer and the hearts. I instinctively lean against you, placing my ear on your chest in that spot that fits so perfectly, between your breasts and just below your sternum.
We are silent for a moment and I can hear our future in that white noise silence. Like putting my ear to a shell, the in and out rhythm of the past and future pulses from you in sweet waves that make me feel like anything is possible.
I don't know when that moment ends and the conversation begins again. I don't know when the words turn into sweet carcasses and carnal grasps. I don't know when our love turns to holding hands while sleeping. I don't know when I know I love you or when I know you love me. I don't know when we start planning our life together. I don't know when my "sad" playlist starts to seem like a silly reminder of a younger me who didn't know who was waiting so soon in the future. I don't know when I realize that this was the easy knowing that everyone always talks about.
I just know that I can hear the most distant time of human existence when I put my head to your chest. I just know that I can see to eternity and back when I look into your brown eyes. I just know I can feel what that word safety means between the lines of your fingers.
And I just know.
A firm knock at the door calms the butterflies. I open the door and feel like I am both floating and sinking into the ground, toes curling with anticipation. Before I can inhale again, I feel your lips on mine and the smile that was resting in my heart explodes out of my teeth, tongue, lips, mouth. Your smile envelopes me when we part....
"hey beautiful!" You say with eyes sparkling.
My eyes dart but you bring them back by a soft touch with your hand. It starts on my forearm but quickly finds its way to my hand as we make our way inside, to the couch.
Your locks fall over your cheeky smile as our eyes meet and we start talking about our days, in the most routine and novel way. It's like we have had this conversation hundreds of times, and even this, the 701st time feels completely new.
You lean back against my pillow- the one I bought before I knew you. The one with the trailer and the hearts. I instinctively lean against you, placing my ear on your chest in that spot that fits so perfectly, between your breasts and just below your sternum.
We are silent for a moment and I can hear our future in that white noise silence. Like putting my ear to a shell, the in and out rhythm of the past and future pulses from you in sweet waves that make me feel like anything is possible.
I don't know when that moment ends and the conversation begins again. I don't know when the words turn into sweet carcasses and carnal grasps. I don't know when our love turns to holding hands while sleeping. I don't know when I know I love you or when I know you love me. I don't know when we start planning our life together. I don't know when my "sad" playlist starts to seem like a silly reminder of a younger me who didn't know who was waiting so soon in the future. I don't know when I realize that this was the easy knowing that everyone always talks about.
I just know that I can hear the most distant time of human existence when I put my head to your chest. I just know that I can see to eternity and back when I look into your brown eyes. I just know I can feel what that word safety means between the lines of your fingers.
And I just know.
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